Gavin Clarkson and his fiancée went to get a marriage license. This was in Washington DC, where she lives. The clerk at the Courts Marriage Bureau asked for Clarkson’s ID. He gave her his driver’s license. The clerk rejected it because it was from New Mexico.

Nope. She said he had to produce his passport. His ‘New Mexico passport.’ Because she thought New Mexico was another country, not one of these United States.

New Mexico and Arizona weren’t ALWAYS states. Maybe the DC Courts Marriage Bureau is stuck in 1911.

Clarkson pointed out her error. She was skeptical. She checked with a supervisor, who said yes, Clarkson needed a passport. “You know you are from flyover country when… they come back and say: ‘My supervisor says we cannot accept international driver’s licenses. Do you have a New Mexico passport?’” reported Clarkson. Meanwhile, “All the couples behind us waiting in line were laughing.”

Countries issue passports. Not states. The clerk was polite, complimenting Clarkson on his English. Yet Clarkson dug in his heels. He refused to produce an imaginary passport and he refused to leave. The clerk went back to check again. Someone finally gave her the okay to accept the driver’s license as ID. She apologized.

The DC bureau seems to have been acting out of ignorance, not meanness. Ignorance with a big bow of red tape on top.

Clarkson, who has been a New Mexico state politician, told the Las Cruces Sun News about what happened, probably because this happens so often to New Mexicans that New Mexico Magazine reports such stories under the head “One of Our 50 is Missing.” It’s as if people hear the word “Mexico” and turn their brains off. ‘Oh, duty-free shopping!’ they exclaim. ‘You can get antibiotics without a prescription there.’ ‘I was just there, in Cancún.’

Perhaps they were misled by this map of the United States in the Catalan language, maybe that’s what happened? Nou Mèxic sounds pretty far away. From the Districte de Columbia.

But also, geographic ignorance is appallingly widespread. Sumac once spoke with a rental car agent who wondered if they use dollars in Alaska.

The wording of the clerk’s apology wasn’t in the stories SorryWatch saw. But after Clarkson told the Sun News about what happened, Leah Gurowitz, the director of media and public relations for the D.C. Courts, emailed this apology:

We understand that a clerk in our Marriage Bureau made a mistake regarding New Mexico’s 106-year history as a state. We very much regret the error and the slight delay it caused a New Mexico resident in applying for a DC marriage license.

That’s feeble. It’s good they looked up the history of New Mexico’s statehood. But it wasn’t just one person who said Clarkson had to produce a passport – it was the clerk and the first supervisor. And the person apologizing isn’t the one who gets to say, ‘oh it was just a tiny little delay.’ We’d like them to say something like “We bought an atlas of the United States and we will use in the future. Rest easy, marriage-minded citizens of New Mexico, New Jersey, New Hampshire and New York!”

Wait. We’re spying on UTAH?

Clarkson suspects he would have had less hassle if he’d used his Choctaw Nation ID instead of his state license. Maybe. He and his fiancée got married the same day all this happened. It was his birthday. SorryWatch is glad the “slight delay” didn’t prevent these two events from being on the same day. Congratulations and best wishes! And don’t worry if you’re honeymooning in New Mexico—the water should be fine to drink.

(Thanks to Ron L., who put this story where SorryWatch could see it.)