Snarky non-apologizing is tres chic right now. Ironic fashion is everything. So let’s unapologetically check out some merch.

First we have this “Sorry Not Sorry” hat from Urban Outfitters. Express your disdain for emotional generosity via a watchcap! 

Next, we have the Petite Sorry Not Sorry necklace from I Still Love You NYC. “This statement necklace lets you tell everyone exactly what you’re thinking in the most meme friendly [sic] way possible,” says the display copy. Memes show that you are clued in to the youth culture of the youth. And memes are not at all tired and played out in three months, so they provide precisely the sort of lack of evanescence I look for in my jewelry.

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From the Derelicte collection, there’s the “I’m Not Sorry” Twisted Seam Muscle Tee in Antique Wash. It is $125, but it has a raw hem.

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Wait — it’s not Derelicte; it’s Pam & Gela, the new company from the founders of Juicy Couture, couturier to Snooki. My mistake. (I’m not sorry.) A portion of the proceeds go to the Derek Zoolander Center For Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Want to Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too.

And finally, we have the Textile Elizabeth and James Not Sorry Bowery Tee. (Elizabeth & James is the fashion line of the Olsen twins.)

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It retails for $92, but it’s on sale! “Show off that you are unapologetic about your taste in fashion when you sport this Textile Elizabeth and James™ tee,” says the copy. I wonder why it’s called the “Not Sorry Bowery” tee? “Bowery” does not appear on the shirt. Maybe this is sharp-edged commentary on the disappearance of the historical Bowery, with its skid row and honkytonks and flophouses, ever-more-rapidly displaced by hipster hotels, chic restaurants, finance-bro-oriented bars and upscale boutiques that sell Olsen-esque-clothing. The shirt is saying that the real Bowery, like the word Bowery on the shirt itself, is present in its absence.

That’s probably it.

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