You probably read about that guy who informed La Crosse, WI news anchor Jennifer Livingston she was not “a suitable example for this community’s young people, girls in particular” and that she should “reconsider” allowing her unattractive self to appear on TV because “obesity is one of the worst choices a person can make.” (Berating, hectoring and attempting to shame a stranger is apparently a more excellent choice.)Livingston made the fine choice to respond to the concern troll on-air, calling his behavior what it was: Bullying. “To all of the children out there who feel lost, who are struggling with your weight, with the color of your skin, your sexual preference, your disability, even the acne on your face, listen to me right now. Do not let your self-worth be defined by bullies.” (Update: There is a new web site called Better Than the Bullies where people can post responses to weight-based bullying.)

The bully in question responded to the outcry of support for Livingston with: “Given this country’s present epidemic of obesity and the many truly horrible diseases related thereto…I hope [Livingston] will finally take advantage of a rare and golden opportunity…by transforming herself for all her viewers to see over the next year, and, to that end, I would be absolutely pleased to offer Jennifer any advice or support she would be willing to accept.”

It is a truth universally acknowledged that people who use “thereto” tend to be douchenozzles.

When people with souls were unimpressed by his oh-so-generous response, dude re-responded with the classic, ever-winning “if” non-apology: “If she is offended, I truly apologize to Jennifer.” If you were sorry, you would not say if.

Let’s move on. Mr Kenneth Krause, personal injury attorney, may your empathy one day be as big as your biceps.

Ride away now.

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