Someone stole a life-sized statue of Jesus from a church in Toronto. This may have been easier than it sounds, since the statue was a) made of resin, b) outdoors, and c) not on a plinth but at ground level. Still, Rev. Maggie Helwig of the Church of St. Stephen-in-the-Fields thought it would have required two people to lift it.

Or maybe it was made of fiberglass. Reports differ. Anyway it was missing. Someone stole Jesus. Woe and despair! We gnash our fiberglass teeth and rend our fiberglass garments.

The Adoration of the Golden Calf, Nicolas Poussin. It’s a party calf.

The statue was called “Whatsoever You Do.” As in “Whatsoever you do for the least of these, you do it for me,” a saying of Jesus according to Matthew 25:40. (Translations differ, sometimes using the word “Whatever.”)

It was in the form of a beggar wrapped in a blanket, holding out a hand. The clue that the beggar is actually Jesus is the large nail hole in the palm. The sculptor, Timothy Schmalz, has done other work with a similar theme, notably a statue called “Homeless Jesus,” which shows a figure wrapped in a blanket sleeping on a park bench. In that work the feet stick out of the blanket, and nail holes are on view. In November Pope Francis spotted it in Rome and blessed it.

Or maybe he prayed over it. Accounts differ. Anyway, he said he liked it. (It is also available as a miniature.)

When the Toronto statue was stolen, Reverend Helwig said it was “a theft from the community.” Schmalz was “in shock.” He felt dread, and wondered if it was a hate crime.

Another copy of the statue, this one in Ottawa. I know, you have a million ideas for things to do with this. But are they good ideas?

A few weeks later, the statue reappeared at the back of St. Stephen-in-the-Fields, with a note on it. The note said “I’m sorry, it seemed like a good idea at the time.”

It’s awfully short, but I like it. It’s elegant.

It certainly avoids the me-me-me problem of so many apologies. There’s no need to describe the offense. We might wonder why on earth it ever seemed like a good idea, but sometimes you can’t even say yourself what was going through your mind, right?

Schmalz, the sculptor, doesn’t seem to be asking questions. “It makes me feel good and it shows Toronto is an amazing city,” Schmalz told the Star. “In a lot of different cities you would never see it again. In Toronto you get it brought back and you have a letter posted on it that says ‘I’m sorry.’” He said he respected the courage it took to return the statue.

I feel that Schmalz should be a good judge of courage. Surely an artist – an artist who treats Christian themes! – who sticks by the name Schmalz is a courageous man. A man who boldly declares, “I am Schmalz! I studied under Kitsch! Who was a student of Saccharine, influential in the school of Hokum. My later work has been compared to Bathos” – that’s a man with nerve.