by sumac | Jun 9, 2014 | Corporate Apologies
When Fifi Nom de Plume retired, her dental insurance continued, but she was switched to a retiree’s plan. No doubt that is a deluxe plan for people whose teeth have experienced more wear and tear, yet the words that cross Fifi’s mind these days are “lowest...
by sumac | Jun 1, 2014 | Funny-on-Purpose Apologies
If you’ve been reading the Publican’s Morning Advertiser, you know that the Portman Group condemns the advertising for Dead Pony Club Ale, and [has instructed retailers not to place orders] for the irresponsible stuff. The Portman Group? Who are they? How...
by sumac | May 17, 2014 | Institutional Apologies, Religious Apologies
Jessica Urbina, a senior at Sacred Heart Cathedral Preparatory school (SHC) in San Francisco, got a great picture for the yearbook. In the portrait, taken on the school’s Picture Day, Urbina’s beaming in a natty tuxedo, a look that also worked for her at...
by sumac | May 15, 2014 | Institutional Apologies
In Oakland, California, postal officials looked at the area around the main office and found it flawed. There was a parking lot for mail trucks, and a street with wide sidewalks adorned with flourishing ficus trees, and there was bird shit all over everything. I mean....
by sumac | May 8, 2014 | Media Apologies
J.K. Rowling, beloved creator of Hedwig the owl, was a single parent after her marriage broke up. Surviving on state benefits, and with no childcare, she also worked a few hours at a church where they let her bring her child and kindly employed her for just enough...
“Say You’re Sorry”January 7, 2026
Did you “forget” you stuck me with the bill for your twelve espressos?December 19, 2025
I value my idiot constituentsJune 3, 2025
I stunk when I called you a stinkerApril 29, 2025
A person of interest, who can find? Actually, we’re not interested. Nothing to see here. Sorry!March 19, 2025