This January six “Greek” organizations at the University of Michigan planned a lovely winter weekend holiday. Sigma Alpha Mu, and Sigma Delta Tau booked 40 rooms at the Treetops resort in Gaylord, Michigan, to shelter upwards of 200 members. Pi Kappa Alpha, Chi Psi, Delta Gamma and Alpha Phi booked 12 condo units at the Boyne Highlands skit resort in Harbor Springs, Michigan, for perhaps 100-120 more.

Photo: National Baseball Hall of Fame. Public domain.

Fleet Walker, the first African-American player in the Major Leagues (as catcher with the Toledo Blue Stockings in 1883), played varsity baseball for UM, and hence was a Wolverine, though not, apparently, a fraternity member.

On Saturday there were complaints about noise and profanity from other guests. Management spoke to fraternity and sorority members, who said they’d rein it in.

But then there was rampaging.

Apparently under the impression they were 1970s rock stars, invading Visigoths, exuberant toddlers with My First Battle-Axe – or wait, actual wolverines? – they trashed the premises. They broke windows (terrible idea in Michigan in January). They broke furniture, kicked doors off hinges, ripped down ceilings, punctured walls, broke fixtures, smashed EXIT signs, and got carpets very very dirty. Yeah, there was peeing where no peeing should be. Maybe they were in the grip of divine madness.

They did $100,000 damage at Treetops, $25,000 at Boyne Highlands. They were just getting started, but the buzzkill state police escorted them from the premises before they could hit their stride.

Much ado. The national fraternities and sororities suspended the chapters. The resorts hired disaster clean-up crews and worked feverishly to make the rooms and units usable again. UM indicated deep disapproval and formed a task force to create an honor code.

And there were various apologies.

Project Gutenberg. Public domain.

What did you THINK the fire extinguisher would do, Antigone?

Before I evaluate one of these apologies, I should disclose bias. I should admit that I have never really gotten over discovering that fraternity and sorority members do not necessarily speak or even study Greek. I don’t know why I assumed they did, except they all HAVE GREEK NAMES. And they seemed to be all traditional, and I associate traditional university learning with studying Latin and Greek. In the college town where I grew up, the houses on Fraternity Row all HAD GREEK NAMES. In addition to big CLASSICAL-type pillars. Q.E.D.

Pompeiian painting. Public domain.

They say we have to keep it down. And somebody told them we have pets in the rooms.

Aside from the fact that they’re a bunch of posers, linguistically speaking, I have nothing against them. The frats on the Row made elaborate tableaux on the lawns for something called the Big Game, and that seemed nice. Public-spirited. The college I went to didn’t have “Greek” organizations because it was too small. Also too thrilled with itself, intellectually speaking – they actually taught Latin and Greek. This rubbed off enough so I pronounce “hubris” differently than most people, and make myself look ignorant.

My point: no one in a “Greek” organization was ever mean to me. I was never scarred by rushing or hazing. I don’t have a dog in this Greco-Roman match.

This joint apology comes from UM’s Interfraternity Council president, its Panhellenic Association president, and its student body president:

This past weekend… six of our Greek organizations caused substantial and extensive damages to resort properties. This terrible incident has been widely publicized across the nation, and rightly so: it was an act of shocking disrespect. We, as leaders and Greeks at the University of Michigan, do not tolerate these kinds of acts, nor do we let such behavior fall under the radar. We intend to handle this situation with the utmost efficiency, and we will ensure that those responsible for the damage to the properties will be held accountable throughout this process.

Such vandalism or disrespect of any kind, especially to this degree, does not reflect the standards of our community. We value tradition, honesty, character, and above all, integrity. The events that occurred last weekend deface the honor we place upon each of these values, and we would like to express our regret that such unprincipled action reflects so poorly on our community. We are deeply sorry that the misbehavior of a few individuals has caused harm not only to the property but to the communities at large.

In the weeks to come, the Greek community will utilize all of our internal processes to enforce accountability and justice. We will work to restore the good balance of our affiliates, and we will be looking for ways to begin repairing our relationship and trust with each resort as well as the communities in northern Michigan. Our long-term, positive interaction continues to be a priority for us moving forward, and we hope to make the changes necessary in order to fulfill that goal.

Got it? We’re not the kind of people who DO that. That thing. That thing we did.

They start out well enough by admitting the damages were big. But then they blow it. No, it was just a few individuals! A few hundred individuals! It’s a classic That’s Not Who I Am apology.

Also, ‘We’re sorry this makes us look bad.’ Oh please.

Photo: Infrogmation. Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license.

Toga parties – step in the right direction? Pathetic gesture? Cultural appropriation? Discuss.

There are built-in problems when you speak for a group, and this is one of them. If you say “Our group doesn’t act like that,” you then need to address why part of the group acts like that.

There are negative stereotypes about fraternity and sorority members. There’s validity in rejecting those stereotypes as unfair and inaccurate, but I suspect some people join fraternities and sororities precisely because they buy into those stereotypes and want to be part of it. That probably happens more often than joining because they always wished their high school offered classical Greek.

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